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Of Like Passion

DKP - 02 Nov 07 - 11:48 AM

Ch. 20: Give and Take

Normally, I prefer to read completed stories, too, and avoid WiPs with determination. After getting started on this saga with RaH and FFaF, though, I hopelessly lost all willpower...


Ah, after your lovely but... disheartening... opening quote, Adaneth, that was quite an "understanding" that Saelon and Dírmaen reached. At least they both were able to frankly state their minds. Saelon's dictation is well-made, too, for Dírmaen's prejudices are definitely getting in the way.


It leads me back to the previous chapter, where you used Auð's PoV so eloquently to highlight Veylin's own prejudices and their parallels with the Ranger's: both seem to have met the "wrong" types (or I should say, "typical" types) of each other's race on the road, and neither seems very willing to allow for exceptions. (I notice, for example, that Veylin does not mention Halladan's respectful relationship with Saelon.) I thought I might have caught some allowance being made in Veylin's attitude towards Dírmaen at the end of this final chapter, but perhaps I'm reading too much into it.


Small points I really enjoyed: I love Auð's thoughts about her menfolk (and male Dwarves in general) in the previous chapter, and Veylin's opinion about Thyrð's curiosity in this one. Veylin's care in his speech with Saelon is touching in its deep respect and regard. I love the twists that you so naturally and casually tuck in: The strangeness of Men was a lode that could not be exhausted. I know cultural differences are a main part of your stories, but you repeatedly allow me to truly walk in a Dwarf's boots.


I have a renewed appreciation for your title: you've shown us everyone's various passions, so alike even in their dissimilar focuses. I can't praise your stories highly enough, whether the topic is pacing, tone, style, quality, characterizations, setting – they are all done so very well. If anything, I am always left wishing for more details. (Did Saelon find anything of note herself when the tide went out? What was it like for her and Dírmaen to be stuck in the hall for the storm's duration? Etc. etc.)


It promised to be a most interesting journey to Lindon. Oh, indeed – I can hardly wait for you to get us started, even though I'm now approaching it with mixed enthusiasm and trepidation...

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Of Like Passion

Elrûn - 06 Nov 07 - 1:09 AM

Ch. 20: Give and Take

Dear Adaneth,

Dírmaen is so jealous it hurts. Nonetheless, I hope his luck will yet turn. I cannot wait to see how your story unfolds!


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Of Like Passion

Adaneth - 06 Nov 07 - 10:38 AM

Ch. 20: Give and Take

Thank you once again for your comments, Elrûn and DKP.  Please accept my apologies for ending things where I did--but if I didn't cut it off there, I would have had to go on for another 40,000 words, and I'm trying to keep each story at a managable length.  Since I had resolved the issues raised at the beginning of the story, it was time to move on.

But I'm already working on the next story, and should begin rolling it out by Thanksgiving.

In the meantime, I've got a short "prequel" one-shot in the works.  Someone asked for Dwarven romance for their birthday . . . . 



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