This is one of the best parodies I have read in a long time! It manages to be completely silly, yet written in a serious manner. I especially loved the bit about Legolas' arm growing back:
With a shrug of his shoulders and a smug look, Legolas replied: "What can I say? I have good genes."
"I wanted to try something a little different. You know, behave like I am as noble and as fair in face as an elf-lord, as strong as a warrior, as wise as a wizard, as venerable as a king of dwarves, and as kind as summer. I am over six millennia old, and I have seen the greatest joys and the deepest sorrows the likes of which you could not conceive. I thought I should start trying to act like it. What do you think?"
I think you are brilliant!
Great job! I will definitely be reading this fic again.