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Comments for: To Wrap An Elven Princeling

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13 Comments

 
 

To Wrap An Elven Princeling

Lady Bluejay - 28 Jan 07 - 11:24 AM

General Comment

Loved greywing's picture so much I had to read the story that inspired it.

Elves have not been my thing in the past but I really enjoyed this and I am getting very fond of your Thranduil.

A very well written story. LBJ

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To Wrap An Elven Princeling

Jael - 29 Jan 07 - 5:12 PM

General Comment

Loved greywing's picture so much I had to read the story that inspired it.

I just want to say to everyone who posted comments --  Isn't this the best illustration ever?  I'm just flabbergasted, and I'm showing it to everyone.  Including my mother.  LOL

Thank you so much, greywing!

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To Wrap An Elven Princeling

Chathol-linn - 26 Dec 06 - 3:27 PM

Ch. 1: Prologue: The Forest

Of the many wonderful features of this work, the thing I like best is that it tells a story. The author has given herself enough room and words to develop characters, make them face hard challenges with unforeseen consequences, and come to resolution; in this case, very satisfyingly. Each word counts. I have read the story a couple of times now and am retuning to leave comments on each chapter.

In Prologue, I liked the quick establishment of the scene and the key players. Right away we get a sense of Thranduil's layered character, which will be a theme throughout the story, as more is revealed. I loved the names selected for the original characters. Seregon and Saerlin were lovely examples of Elvish names that don't follow the A-E-I-O-U-iel pattern. The conclusion of Prologue was a skillful grabber of the reader's attention. I was hooked.

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To Wrap An Elven Princeling

Chathol-linn - 26 Dec 06 - 5:59 PM

Ch. 2: The River Child

River Child develops the plot by introducing additional believable characters and giving them motivations and lives that are counter to those of the Elves. I identified with Tulie, even though normally I take exception to viewing women's moon blood as a disappointment. It was absolutely necessary for her character and for the overall story. Tulie and Tamin are shown as sympathetic and warm, but not perfect.

Storytelling skill is really on display in River Child. Jael has to manage to get Thranduil away from his stronghold under very difficult circumstances. She uses his character and that of his friends to good effect in achieving it. She also has to get a certain shiny shirt separated from a certain princeling and send it on its way. It is hard work to figure how to get people and things to the right places and times in order to make the story happen. Jael does it while continuing to build on Thranduil's character.

During River Child we get tidbits that we'd never have thought of on our own, such as the hair braiding business. That's what I really like about stories – they tell you things you didn't already know, along with the parts you're already familiar with.

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To Wrap An Elven Princeling

TariElfLady - 16 Apr 10 - 1:17 PM

Ch. 2: The River Child

I can understand Tuilie's need to have a child of her own, but keeping someone else's, even for a short time is wrong.  She does not realize how devastated Legolas father would be at the potention loss of his son.  I hope Legolas is returned in time.

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To Wrap An Elven Princeling

Chathol-linn - 26 Dec 06 - 7:05 PM

Ch. 3: Fire And Mist

Fire and Mist takes place mostly in Dale, and Jael introduces a small subplot in the characters of Girion and his son. The subplot strengthens our appreciation of Thranduil's predicament by showing a parallel relationship between the Mortal leader and his son. More good storytelling occurs when we wait, with Thranduil, for news of doom, and with him we are shaken when it comes – with a surprise. During this passage Thrnaduil's character continues to grow. I love it that he is good with the ladies. I always pictured him that way; the handsome warrior king who had a way with the ladies. Mighty Thranduil Oropherion indeed. The character development of Thranduil is done with the lightest of touches.

The next passage of Fire and Mist returns to the Woodsfolk couple Tamin and Tulie and their relatives Ottan and Serka. Great names for original characters. Through Tulie's and Tamin's morality, Jael moves the story's characters along, and now young Legolas plays a part as well. Ottan provides a vector for villainy, and we are left wondering what mischief he will do.

I thought that Prologue and River Child showed good storytelling, and Fire and Mist improved it. The next chapter had the best of all in my opinion.

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To Wrap An Elven Princeling

TariElfLady - 19 Apr 10 - 2:32 PM

Ch. 3: Fire And Mist

It seems like one tragedy after another follows Thranduil.  First he looses his beloved wife, then his son disappears and now Dale has been destroyed.  This will either make him or break him.  I know it will make him stronger.  Legolas will be returned to him.  I hope Ottan gets his just rewards and that Thranduil is not to hard on Tulie.

Each chapter is better than the proceeding one.

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To Wrap An Elven Princeling

Chathol-linn - 26 Dec 06 - 7:18 PM

Ch. 4: Dragon Weather

Dragon Weather

This is the payoff chapter. Jael has to make a lot of things come together, and she does so with total ease and credibility. It is the culmination of the plot lines and the character development for Thranduil, Tamin, and Thulie. I loved the exchange between Thranduil and the dragon; also the tidbit that reinforced the dragon lore about hoarding and greed. The confrontation between Thranduil and Ottan was satisfying, as was the eventual resolution between Thulie's talents and Legolas's needs. And Thranduil was so brave. But frighteningly unperfect.

I do not know the meaning of nachuithron. I haven't looked it up. Some things are best left alone. But if the author would send me a private e-mail explaining it I would be grateful.

If I had one criticism worth mentioning, it would be my objection to the use of "elfling." The Professor never used it and I just don't think the Elves thought of their young ones that way. But that is a light criticism and not meant to detract from this delightful story.

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To Wrap An Elven Princeling

Greywing - 28 Jan 07 - 8:16 AM

Ch. 4: Dragon Weather

A very charming story, with a wonderfully believable characterisation of the Elvenking, and witty humour (so typical of your work) at appropriate places. It was a very great pleasure to illustrate this scene. I see now that I have accidentally overlooked some details -- Thranduil was holding his sword barehanded rather than with gloves.

Keep writing!

Cheerfully yours,

Greywing

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To Wrap An Elven Princeling

Crowdaughter - 29 Jan 07 - 11:54 AM

Ch. 4: Dragon Weather

Wow! Found this through a comment and had to check it out. And lo! What a beautiful picture for this great story! (*Envies*). I've said already elsewhere how much I admire this fic and how well crafted I think it is, but this great piece of story art provided a most welcome reason for me to check it out and read it again. Smile

And might I say, the picture fits the scene wonderfully - although the scene itself is so very well described that I could see it before my eyes even before. Of course, that is true for the whole fic. Great art, Greywing - and Jael! Wink

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To Wrap An Elven Princeling

TariElfLady - 21 Apr 10 - 10:58 AM

Ch. 4: Dragon Weather

What a joyous reunion between father and son!!! It's a good thing Smaug was so greedy. Things might have gone down a very dark road. Thranduil did learn something very important; people are more important than things.

The welfare and needs of others are of great concern to Thranduil. His kindness to the people of Dale and to Tulie and Tamin says a lot about this cantankerous elf. The dragon will receive his due some day, but not at the hand of Thranduil.

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To Wrap An Elven Princeling

Chathol-linn - 26 Dec 06 - 7:23 PM

Ch. 5: Epilogue: The Forest

Epilogue.

I admired how Jael has all the main characters, including little Legolas, achieve growth through his own efforts. The story ends with a satisfying conclusion and dénouement. And now we know how Frodo's mithril coat came to the hoard of Smaug the Dragon. I liked this story a lot. Nicely done, Jael.

Regards – Chathol-linn

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To Wrap An Elven Princeling

TariElfLady - 23 Apr 10 - 9:59 AM

Ch. 5: Epilogue: The Forest

Well done, Jael.  I really enjoyed this story.  Now we know how Smaug got the mithril coat, and Legolas is on his to becoming a warrior.

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