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Comments for: As the Tide by the Moon

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As the Tide by the Moon

JunoMagic - 25 Nov 05 - 3:41 AM

Ch. 15: The Heir -IV

I have to admit that I am a bit in doubt about this chapter...

At the beginning I feel there is not enough about Eledher, I cannot really *see* her, especially when she starts screaming at them. After that, she's there, and  perfectly characterized, I think. But before that moment, she's a bit "flat".

What made me frown a bit was how quickly Éomer believes her and how calm he remains. Of course that sets off Théodred's reaction very well (that was really great btw, poor man!). But I think if you put in sort of a short, volatile flare of temper at the beginning, Éomer would work better. If he's not so calm and reasonable throughout the chapter.

And *sigh* how horribly sad! :-(

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As the Tide by the Moon

EdorasLass - 25 Nov 05 - 2:20 PM

Ch. 15: The Heir -IV

But before that moment, she's a bit "flat".

Oh, yes, she's meant to be. :)  It is Theodred's POV, after all, and that's his interpretation of her behaviour.

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