Things You Should Never Say At The Table: 1. 1

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1. 1

Nothing can be heard but chomping and chewing, and Beorn smiles to himself.

Always a good sign, he thinks, when the needless chatter stops.

He sips from his mug and surveys the scene- everything is as it should be. Even the Halfling is happy.

"I must say, Beorn, that this cheese is delectable- I've never tasted anything like it!"

Beorn nods.

"My own special recipe."

The Halfling nods in return.

"I make it from moose-milk."

The Dwarves look in horror at their plates, and the Halfling continues his breakfast, and the Wizard laughs loud and long.

Beorn, meanwhile, is baffled…


This is a work of fan fiction, written because the author has an abiding love for the works of J R R Tolkien. The characters, settings, places, and languages used in this work are the property of the Tolkien Estate, Tolkien Enterprises, and possibly New Line Cinema, except for certain original characters who belong to the author of the said work. The author will not receive any money or other remuneration for presenting the work on this archive site. The work is the intellectual property of the author, is available solely for the enjoyment of Henneth Annûn Story Archive readers, and may not be copied or redistributed by any means without the explicit written consent of the author.

Story Information

Author: Aruthir

Status: General

Completion: Complete

Era: 3rd Age - The Stewards

Genre: Humor

Rating: General

Last Updated: 01/17/14

Original Post: 01/15/14

Go to Things You Should Never Say At The Table overview

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