11. From Rohan With Love
| Dear dad- This is actually the second postcard I've tried to write to you, the first one being completely illegible since I was writing in the car and we were for some reason driving down a gravel road at the time. I just wanted to let you know that I'm still alive despite the headache that this trip has been so far. I know I only left four hours ago, but already I'm wishing I hadn't. The feeling started not far outside the city limits- I'm riding with Halbarad because Elrohir opted to fill our car with three of the loudest of Aragorn's friends and dub it the "party wagon". Anyhow, we had just left the city, and Halbarad kept making worried faces, as if something were wrong with the car. I started to worry too when he pulled into a petrol station on the highway. But then he got out, rummaged around in his duffle bag, and proceeded to gaffer tape a Gondorian flag to the hood of his El Camino. He got back in with a satisfied smile. It just went downhill from there. I won't even comment on the music. Anyhow, I'll probably write again soon because there's nothing better to do. --Elladan | Elrond Peredhel 307 Or Herentië Imladris T2K 2B7 |
| You were right. There are 122 oil donkeys between Rivendel and the Highway 219 turnoff. I counted them, even though Halbarad kept telling me not to. The counting annoyed him for some reason. But his singing along with Limp Bizkit annoyed me, so I figure it was a fair trade. We've stopped at six different petrol stations so far and have only been gone nine hours. I think everyone is sorry they invited Elrohir to come along with the convoy. His frequent peeing is slowing down the entire operation. I've tried to talk to him about his ten-litre-a-day Diet Dr. Pepper habit, but he doesn't listen. I should get him to give you a ring once we get to a motel or something- maybe you can talk some sense into him. Expect another post card soon. Postage in these parts is cheap and plentiful. --Elladan | Glorfindel 3726 Hithui Ave. Imladris T4T 0Z4 |
Dear Grandpa, I think you'll be able to sympathise | Celeborn 835 King Amroth Boulevard Caras Galadhon, Lórien G1A 1B4 Rhovanion |
| You'll note by the picture on this postcard that I am now in Isengard National Park. We are staying in a bad motel (big surprise). After driving all day I was really looking forward to a quiet night of going to bed early, but you know how it goes when Elrohir is involved. He and Halbarad and a few others have gone off to play on the highway. They stole some orange construction barricades from the roadside and used them to block off one entire lane so that they could play Frisbee on the asphalt. From the sounds of things, the passing motorists are none too impressed. If we all get arrested for mischief, you know what happened and I'll be counting on you to tell the judge I was not involved in any way. | Glorfindel 3726 Hithui Ave. Imladris T4T 0Z4 |
| Dear dad, Here I am in scenic Isengard. Originally I was a bit worried about staying here, what with all the terrorists and all, but Halbarad seems confident that they are all concentrating their efforts to the south and we should be fine. I wanted to buy you a souvenir from the motel gift shop, but unfortunately all they sold were crappy little plastic Tower of Orthanc key chains and inflatable palantir beach balls, so you'll have to make do with this postcard. Elrohir says hello too- he'd write something himself, but he somehow got a pylon stuck on his hand (don't ask). Lots of love, Elladan (and Elrohir). | Elrond Peredhel 307 Or Herentië Imladris T2K 2B7 |
| Arwen- As promised, I am writing to let you know that Aragorn is safe, and that I gave him that thing you made. I told him to phone you too, but he probably won't because he's busy doing something that involves being a pompous arse. Maybe you should try him on his mobile one of these days. But anyway, he's perfectly fine. In dire need of a shower and clean clothes, but that's about par for the course. We met up with them all this morning- Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli. We just narrowly missed a large party of Ents, but Aragorn says he took some photos for you, since he knows you've always wanted to see Ents. They made quite a mess of Isengard (the Ents, not Aragorn et al). The highway was nigh impassable. I'll write again when we get to Gondor-- Elladan. | Arwen 307 Or Herentië Imladris T2K 2B7 |
| Dear Bilbo, Since I'm sure nobody else will take the time to do this, I thought I'd be the responsible one and let you know that Frodo and his friend Sam have gone off on their own for Mordor. Aragorn seems to think they'll do alright though, so I wouldn't worry too much. They passed through Lórien a while back and were equipped for the journey by my grandfather, who is rather keen on safety and likely loaded them up with all sorts of things they won't ever use. So even if Mordor is dreadful this time of year, they'll be alright. Yours, Elladan | Bilbo Baggins na Elrond Peredhel 307 Or Herentië Imladris T2K 2B7 |
| Dear Grandma; In his anger, Aragorn is forcing me to write to you and say that the camping tarp he borrowed, the one that was outside rolled up against the garage, was full of bees. We tried to camp out last night on our way to Paths of the Dead, but it was a fiasco. Aragorn hauled the tarp out of the car he hired in Edoras, undid all the bungees, grandly unfurled it, and was soon attacked by bumble bees. Elrohir got one stuck in his ear. It was not a pleasant experience. We all ran back to the vehicles to escape the bees, only to see that Elrohir's iguana had stepped on the power lock button and locked us out of the Topaz. We had to cram into the hired car until the bees went away, then try to coax the iguana onto the unlock button. Not an easy task. I just knew the iguana was going to cause some sort of hassle. I told Elrohir to leave it at home with the cat in Glorfindel's care, but he wouldn't listen. Maybe being locked out of the car and surrounded by bees will teach him his lesson for next time. Love, Elladan | Galadriel |
| Dear dad, We arrived today at Paths of the Dead National Historical Site, right on schedule (according to Aragorn, though I don't think he really has a schedule). Only trouble is, nobody realised it costs $12 to go through, and they don't allow cars. So if we want to pass through, we'll have to leave our vehicles here and walk. Aragorn is furious with Elrohir for suggesting we come this way. So are the others. I'm not too concerned, since I'm not really attached to the Topaz and don't mind abandoning it in the car park, but Aragorn refuses to abandon his hired car because then he won't get his deposit back. It's shaping up to be a long argument, but really, we don't have any other choice now that we've come this far. We'll have to hitchhike to Minas Tirith, but at this point I've given up caring what happens. As long as I live through it I think I'll be alright. Love, Elladan. | Elrond Peredhel 307 Or Herentië Imladris T2K 2B7 Eriador |
| Elrohir and I, with a group of others, have just gone through the Paths of the Dead National Historical Site in north Gondor, and I must say it's not an experience I'd like to repeat. It was by far the creepiest place I've ever been, so I thought I'd do my best to share that creepiness via this postcard. Supposedly that white blur on the left side next to the exit is some form of ghostly activity, at least according to the fellow who works in the gift shop, but that's always open to interpretation. But, now that we're through, our plan is to take a tour bus down to the coast and then arrive in Minas Tirith by boat. I'm not too sure on the logistics of it, since last I looked Minas Tirith was quite a ways inland, but our mate Aragorn's arranging the whole thing so I just smile and nod. It's one of those trips... Cheers, Elladan. | Rúmil and Ardlor 410 - 127 3rd Ave SE Caras Galadhon, Lórien G7K 1M8 Rhovanion |
Dear Círdan- You'd be very proud of me. I'm on a | Grey Havens University |
| Dear Glorfindel, We are now in Minas Tirith. Things are much worse here than they showed on the news before we left. Aragorn seems confident that everything will be fine, but I'm not so sure. We arrived in the middle of some sort of attack and managed to get that sorted out, but something tells me that actually going to Mordor as per the plan will be somewhat worse. Honestly, I'd rather stay here until this war is over. I'm sick of sleeping outside. Aragorn and Elrohir are sleeping in the tent tonight, since Aragorn for some reason refuses to act decently until he's King (he has a long way to go!), but I made for a hotel. I don't see the sense in depriving myself of civilisation for the next few days when there are perfectly good lodgings right here. I wonder if they'd mind if I chickened out and sped home? --Elladan | Glorfindel 3726 Hithui Ave. Imladris T4T 0Z4 Eriador |
| Dear Dad- This is it. We're leaving for Mordor tomorrow morning. Elrohir claims he's not worried, only the iguana is, so that's why he keeps hugging it and petting it and saying everything will be fine. I think he's fibbing, because I'm sure worried. All things considered, I don't think now would be an opportune time to die. Perhaps because I've not really done anything with my life yet. If I live through this, I think I'll have to make a resolution to do more relevant things. But, in the event of death, I'd like you to have all the ornamental type things I've collected over the years, because I know you like them. You can tell Glorfindel he can have my movies and CDs. As for Erestor, you can tell him that I don't really hate him. It's just that he's sort of a jerk sometimes and I really wish he'd be more considerate when it comes to relationships. But you can give him my love, and Glorfindel and Arwen as well, and know that I will be thinking of everyone on the way to Mordor. Love, Elladan. | Elrond Peredhel 307 Or Herentië Imladris T2K 2B7 Eriador |
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