47. What? Me Worry?
What? Me worry?
Amarie worriedly reviewed the turmoil of the past few days as she walked along the pathway that led to a series of small waterfalls off of the new garden terraces by the workshops. Reaching a small paved overlook she sat on a low stone outcropping and lifted her legs wrapping her arms around her knees.
She found it hard to accept that what had up till now been a wonderful and very personal imaginative world where she let her inner most desires run free had now somehow become very real. She had actually physically gone to Elrond's room and pleasured him in a most wonderful way, but she could not fathom when or what had caused the change from the dream. After all, what you did in dreams you did not necessarily do in real life. Isn't that what dreams were for? To pursue a desire or wish unencumbered by worries of consequences?
And then there was the matter of the impending arrival of Lord Celeborn. In spite of Elrond's assurances she had nothing to worry about regarding him she remained uneasy about it as well. During their now weekly get together she had discreetly tried to question Arwen about her grandparents and was embarrassed when Arwen had looked at her and smiled.
"Amarie, you do not have to tip toe around so, ask straight out what you wish to know about them." Seeing Amarie's agitation she added, "If this is about you and ada you need not worry. We have all hoped he would find someone to share his life with and we are all delighted it is you. Although we would have liked naneth's injury and her departure to have not happened, we long ago accepted that it did. My grandparents know how much ada has personally sacrificed to stay here and do what needed to be done. Both of them love him like a son and want him to be happy."
Amarie found little comfort in her remarks and remained unsettled as she awaited Lord Celeborn's arrival.
A few days after the departure of Tauron, Amarie was on her way to the workshops alone. She had noted that Sadi had not dined with Erestor as was her habit and was worried that perhaps the budding romance had floundered over the visit from the forester. The past mornings had seen Sadi rising late and looking slightly off balanced. She apologized and said she would be along later after she pulled herself together. Much concerned, Amarie hugged her aunt and asked what was wrong and if there was anything she could do to help.
Sadi shook her head. Gathering her thoughts she looked at Amarie and after a short silence spoke approvingly. "Penneth, I am so proud of you, how strong you have become and how well you are able to deal with things. You have become everything I could ever hope you could be."
Amarie, much moved over her aunt's praise, lowered her head then with a sigh. "Pen vuil, you have no idea how unsure I am most of the time. There are things I am very worried about. I am not all that strong."
"Like your relationship with Lord Elrond?" She smiled gently, "Penneth, it is worth dreaming about and fighting for."
Startled Amarie looked at her aunt and said, "You have no idea."
Sadi continued, "For a long time I have had to be the anchor for all of us, first for your grandparents, then for your parents and then for you. When all of the difficulties started, somehow I never found the time to let myself grieve for losses including that of Tauron. Now that we are within the safety of Imladris I have finally been able to do that. It seemed especially important now that there is the possibility of something with Erestor. I want to start it off with all sad memories behind me."
Amarie grinned at her great aunt. "I am sure Erestor will feel the same way."
"Amarie," Erestor called to her the next morning as she strode towards the workshops to start her workday. "May I speak with you?"
"Of course, how are you today?" Pausing with a smile, she turned and waited as he caught up to her.
"Do you know how the meeting with Tauron went? Did they come to some kind of a new understanding?" He asked worried.
"Yes, but it is nothing you should be concerned with. They both had sad memories of how everything ended before. He merely wanted to clear the air before he leaves for the Western Lands. Why?"
"It's Sadi, she has been avoiding me and I am not sure what to do. I was worried I may have done something to upset her."
Amarie shook her head, "I don't think so. Even around me she has been withdrawn and quiet. She tends to get this way when she has to deal with personal issues. It seldom takes more than a few days. I have learned to just leave her alone and wait for her to make the first move."
"I hope so, there are things I need to discuss with her if we are still friends."
"Just friends?" she grinned. "From all those late night dinners I thought things were much more serious than that. Or should I be complaining to Lord Elrond that you have been toying with my aunt's affections?"
He started to sputter indignantly, "I have very serious intentions where Sadi is concerned and you, young elleth, had better mind your manners. Complaining to Elrond indeed, as if he was not already aware of what I intend with regard to her."
"Erestor, my friend, please calm down." She reached out and touched his shoulder, "I apologize. I was merely teasing. I would welcome you into the family gladly if that is your intent."
He suddenly deflated. "No, it is I who should apologize," he sighed. "It's just that I am so unused to this business of courting. I have not had any practice for a long time and I find I become very unsettled quite easily."
Amarie chuckled wryly, "I can easily understand that. I am often that way lately myself."
Erestor looked at her sympathetically, "In your case, it must be especially disconcerting, but you should not worry too much. You have many friends on your side, and one or two of those are quite powerful."
"Powerful?" She responded startled. "What do you mean?"
He looked embarrassed for a moment. "Elrond's hin, and everyone here approves. Lord Celeborn is due here in a week or so and I know he will also approve."
He raised a hand as she started to question him further. "There are others, but I am not at liberty to say anything just yet. Please don't ask just know!" Leaving a very puzzled and confused Amarie standing in the middle of the path, he turned and disappeared into the main house.
This is a work of fan fiction, written because the author has an abiding love for the works of J R R Tolkien. The characters, settings, places, and languages used in this work are the property of the Tolkien Estate, Tolkien Enterprises, and possibly New Line Cinema, except for certain original characters who belong to the author of the said work. The author will not receive any money or other remuneration for presenting the work on this archive site. The work is the intellectual property of the author, is available solely for the enjoyment of Henneth Annûn Story Archive readers, and may not be copied or redistributed by any means without the explicit written consent of the author.