Limericks: 2. The Brothers of Gondor

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2. The Brothers of Gondor

There are two boys from Gondor named ‘Mir’
who defended her eastern frontier
that we hope will be seen
in a nude-bathing scene
when the third movie makes its premier

The oldest Mir brother has steel
That the forum-girls find has appeal
(Though his sword is quite fine,
I speak of his behind….
Its his buns that we all want to feel)

I find that at odd times I ponder
The beautiful dimples of Gondor
And the soft, silky skin
That the dimples lie in….
Sorry… I let my mind wander

The ranger was grim and unshaven
The stewards son searched for a haven
I felt all of fifteen
Watching Viggo and Bean…
But my heart still belongs to the raven

When grey Numenorian eyes
Are just begging to be rhymed with “thighs”
It’s not his morality
But his sexuality
On which my raven relies….

Let Powzie hold on to her raven,
His integrity’s made her a maven.
So upright, so pure;
but I found a cure
for that nonsense, my dear -- Blade-cravin’.

The man was called Boromir
And was good at handling his gear
He would not please his king
Whilst desiring the Ring
And appeared to be quite austere.

Behold beautiful doomed Boromir,
a bright vision from Gondor so drear;
what great luck he is played
so close to the Blade
and with such an admirable rear.

For her ode to a dimple admired
which the Mir brothers' behinds inspired,
flick exclaimed with delight
"Now the end is in sight!"
Next with limericks we'll 'gainst her conspire!

It was launched with dreams of Sean Bean's butt;
and soon followed the ponderings of what
lay beneath those ranger hoods
*yes, my dears, that's the real goods!*
Gleefully we've descended to smut.

In Ithilien's fragrant green wood
I'm a tireless warrior for good,
my swordwork is pleasing
if subtle and teasing
the hidden blade is my ranger-hood.

Tay/powsie/fileg wrote: I desperately want to make a ‘business’ sign to hang over my desk that says “Ogling Dunedain Since 1963” Wouldn’t that look great on my website?

'Ogling Dunedain' read the banner
described lust in an elegant manner,
they've really got the goods
in their cute little hoods-
she got so heated they had to fan her.

There once was a lady named powzie
Who quite fancied grey-eyed Atani
"With those great strong thighs
It's no wonder why I've
Ogled Dúnedain since '63!"

This tendency towards Duanadan ogling
May seem to some mind-boggling
More so with Powzie
At it since sixty three
But to me it seems quite ennobling

There's a poetry maven named Tay
Long has favored the Dúnadain grey;
But will ogling suffice?
Sure 'twood give life some spice
If those ranger hoods came out to play!

Discuss these or any other limericks at this forum.

This is a work of fan fiction, written because the author has an abiding love for the works of J R R Tolkien. The characters, settings, places, and languages used in this work are the property of the Tolkien Estate, Tolkien Enterprises, and possibly New Line Cinema, except for certain original characters who belong to the author of the said work. The author will not receive any money or other remuneration for presenting the work on this archive site. The work is the intellectual property of the author, is available solely for the enjoyment of Henneth Annûn Story Archive readers, and may not be copied or redistributed by any means without the explicit written consent of the author.

Story Information

Author: HA Writers Group

Status: General

Completion: Work in Progress

Era: Multi-Age

Genre: Poetry

Rating: Adult

Last Updated: 11/11/03

Original Post: 06/27/03

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