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Discussing: happy birthday shadow

happy birthday shadow

Happy Birthday, Rachel/Shadow
April 28, 2003
You are SO not the oldest!

They tell you shadows are the place to hide, but listen: no one looks into the sun. - M.E. Davidson

I just could NOT get the last verse to flow properly, so for now, Thorongil will have to try to remember how it goes and who taught him about the strength of brothers who stand together....





 

 

Re: happy birthday shadow

I don't have the words to tell you how touched I am by your gift, or how moved by this story. I just truly don't. What a wonderful surprise! The images of these two together are just so delightful - the serious little commander, the captain lounging on the bench and giving only just enough advice. The wee commander's victory, and his self-possession - exactly as I picture him! And Thorongil, and the song. Oh, the song is lovely. And the last verse - especially coming after such a gorgeous story - is making me weep. Can I confess my undying love to you now? is that all right?

Thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

 

 

Re: happy birthday shadow

No thanks required, shadow, and I hope I didn't 'out' you about your birthday.

This was my way of acknowldeging both parts of your "shadowbright", and of telling you that in your hands, The Blade is as sharp as ever I saw him, and that his charming open-ness in Undertow does not for a moment fool me into thinking he is not capable of hiding a secret under his brightness.

...though they are stronger together, in that braid...


And Hey! We needto get 'Thorongil' on the characters list!!!

 

 

Re: happy birthday shadow

and I hope I didn't 'out' you about your birthday.

For a story like this, I'd be glad to be 'outted'!

And yes, they are, and they will be, stronger together. I'm so grateful and proud that you trust me with the Blade and the Raven - I promise not to lead them astray.

Thorongil for the characters list!
-Rachel

 

 

Re: happy birthday shadow

This was absolutely beautiful, Tay. And, we have Rachel to thank, too, for her stories have inspired such wonderful work

I love to see Boromir as a kid, and the ways in which he resembles Boromir as a man, or the Blade, to put it more accurately. His little game with the pebbles, and the way he has of negotiating with Thorongil to get a song are just proofs that, well... he is his father's son, or, at least, he is learning to be. One nice twist was that Denethor was teaching Boromir songs... I knew he would! And, the song was so very appropriate for the moment.

As Tay, said, in your hands the Blade is as sharp as ever. Thanks to you both for giving me such wonderful insight into these characters I so much love!

 

 

Re: happy birthday shadow

This was so good it hurts.

The last portion of the verse:
the shadow of a raven’s wing
the brightness of a blade
dark and light are brothers
woven in a braid…

with its references to your image of the two brothers overwhelmed me. Although I wanted to see the rest of the verse, it was perfect as it was.

I have been lazy, and here will venture a 'twofer' in the wrong thread: I've reading Colors of the Forest, and Home By Morning and am dazzled. Now I have to go post belatedly in Avon's thread.

Thank you all for such wonderful things to read.

And Rachel - you are definitely not the oldest here.

lyllyn

 

 

Re: happy birthday shadow

Lovely Tay!

The little one considered carefully, then nodded. “Thank you, captain. That was well thought.”
How absolutely endearing! And like Starlight, I love the idea that Denthor taught him the sing. He would after all be well-versed in lore. And the little bit about Boromir finding long Elvish songs tiresome. Ah well, he was an out and out warrior after all.

Rachel:
And yes, they are, and they will be, stronger together. I'm so grateful and proud that you trust me with the Blade and the Raven - I promise not to lead them astray.

Oh, we know you won't! And thank you for bringing the Blade and the Ravne together again

 

 

Re: happy birthday shadow

This was... Tay... this was great. I'm just reduced to a blubbering mess.

When I read Rachel's wonderful, 'Charcoal, Stone and Cloud', what I loved the most about it was the little Boromir and Thorongil interactions. It really pulled at my heartstrings.

That was just one tiny scene however, which left me hungry for more... and you, you wonderful person you, have written a story dedicated to this interaction. Boromir was adorable. Thorongil... the characterisation was so poignant. And the image of Denethor teaching his son how to sing...

I'm sorry. Just so bowled over.

 

 

Re: happy birthday shadow

Tay that was just lovely! And it picks up so beautifully on Rachel's wonderful story as, Klose says.

You've captured just perfectly that feeling of being right on the edge of remembering something, of having something suddenly trigger our very earliest memories.

 

 

Re: happy birthday shadow

You've captured just perfectly that feeling of being right on the edge of remembering something, of having something suddenly trigger our very earliest memories.

I know what you mean! And, I had also felt that, althought I had not been able to recognize that I had... it was a subconscious thing. I ended up with the increasing wish of wanting to know where he had learned the words in the first place, and it sort of of bothered me in the way that it bothers you when you cannot remember something that you wish to remember really badly. That was the most vivid experience!

 

 

Re: happy birthday shadow

Shadow

The wee commander's victory, and his self-possession - exactly as I picture him!

Self possessed is just what I was seeing – a very secure little soul, who treats Thorongil like an equal, if a friend.

And Thorongil, and the song.

Poor Chris suffered through several truly bad attempts at seeing that verse completed, and I had almost decided to go without it, when I consoled myself that that part of the story is about incompletion, and maybe my subconscious was trying to tell me to let go… Certainly Chris was trying to tell me something, but she is much more blunt than my subconscious, and used phrases like “bad” and “don’t” (Have I said often enough how priceless it is to have a beta who can read a story back in you own voice? And knows before she even sees a story that I will have too many paragraph breaks and run-on sentences? Well, I fell in love with Kerouac as a kid…)

I am pleased that you were pleased, and did not think I was moving in on your territory. This just came to me over dinner.



Starlight

And, we have Rachel to thank, too, for her stories have inspired such wonderful work

Indeed, the most amazing thing that happens to me out here are that people actually read and feedback with an eye to trying to figure out what you are saying, and the way that talking in the forums and sharing leads to repeated nibbles of idea. Something I always feel short of.

His little game with the pebbles

After Rachel filled his pockets with pebbles, I thought about how he might amuse himself with them, self-possessed little guy that he is. And I could not resist the image of the army of stones for Gondor, the city of stone.

One nice twist was that Denethor was teaching Boromir songs... I knew he would!

It is you and Altariel who convinced me to try and see that Denethor. I am not sure I write him convincingly, since I am not sure I am convinced… but I handled that here by not really writing him at all, and letting baby Blade handle it.



Lyllyn

This was so good it hurts.

What a lovely thing to hear!

I am glad the verse, even in its partial state, works for you. Chris and I debated heavily about leaving it out, and I never disregard her advice unconsidered, because she usually proves to be right – sometime I am just too close to a story to look at it objectively. But I really wanted those images to be established as coming from an older place. And I also needed to get that thought that standing together increases strength. And, of course, I wanted to show them in a primal form to shadow, and you all.

And I am glad you also like Home By Morning, which came like a piece of automatic writing, but directly from the heart of my oldest arc.


Acacea

The little one considered carefully, then nodded. “Thank you, captain. That was well thought.”
How absolutely endearing!



I did have it in my mind that even at that age, the thing about Boromir would be his security in himself. I let him appraise the captain as much as be appraised – but I also made him good hearted, fair and quick to praise. These are qualities I see in him as an adult as well.


And the little bit about Boromir finding long Elvish songs tiresome. Ah well, he was an out and out warrior after all

I must admit, I like that line. I was not so much concerned about him being a warrior as thinking about Thorongil droning endlessly on in Quenya. And not afraid to say both “no” and that it would be “tiresome.” (I picture Faramir at this age - on the lap, silent and nodding vigorously when asked the same question.)


Klose

I'm just reduced to a blubbering mess.

I am starting to wonder if I should be distressed by the amount on blubbering on my forum! I apologize, and will try to get Jim to draw us some virtual Kleenex to have at the top of the threads.

Thank you indeed, and I will try to write some happier moments – though I thought this might be one of them! I do run to dark, or failing that, introspective…

Rachel’s story moved my heart to tears. And on top of that, as we mention in the e-mail list, I had spent the summer in Gondor with Thorongil, trying to figure out a way to make him Faramir’s father – I never got there, but it did leave time for him to interact with little Blade.


Alawa

You've captured just perfectly that feeling of being right on the edge of remembering something, of having something suddenly trigger our very earliest memories.

Thanks, I have now reached an age where I had some personal feeling for that!!

I thought I would take his memory a little further, but as I neared the end, I thought I might have changed my mind about what it is he is remembering…


Starlight



I ended up with the increasing wish of wanting to know where he had learned the words in the first place, and it sort of of bothered me in the way that it bothers you when you cannot remember something that you wish to remember really badly. That was the most vivid experience!


I left myself with that feeling, as I got pulled into a place I had not intended to go… maybe I will get another challenge out of it if it gels. But mostly, I wanted to create that feeling of things that are lost from childhood unless we are careful to preserve them. I think it bothers Thorongil that he cannot remember because he is the kind of man to carefully preserve such memories.


I most especially want to thank everyone for feedback on the verse. Since the last part came to you unfinished, I was concerned that the third stanza would seem like it doesn’t go with the rest of the poem. I love children’s rhymes, have a big annotated Mother Goose that talks about the origins and political underpinnings of them, and I wanted to get there with this, but it may take awhile to reach that state.

I wanted the verse to be easily taken for a poem about daylight and darkness, and how you need them both for a whole day. But I wanted to get, right from the beginning, the concept of “both of them together” since the underpinning of the song will be that standing together makes you stronger than standing alone. Brothers.

I gave the obvious, daylight/darkness or sun and shadow to Boromir – it is not beyond a child’s grasp, and yet its theme of working together seemed right for Gondor at this time.

I gave the “Twilight” or “elven” verse to Thorongil - his childhood was spent with the people of the twilight – that was why I let this verse be the one he remembers best. And the concept that twilight is made of dark and bright and starlight / all of them, and none refers also to the theme of brothers/family for him – he has all of them, and yet none.

Anyway, I hope to find out the rest of the poem before Thorongil does. But my subconscious is very literal, and it may be telling me that Boromir cannot be truly taught about the strength of brothers until he has one...




 

 

Re: happy birthday shadow

Jim made us this graphic. He's the best!



 

 

Re: happy birthday shadow

ROTFLMAO!!! Oh that is so perfect! My thanks to Jim.

Avon

 

 

Re: happy birthday shadow

Ooh lovely! A big thank you to Jim!
This was sorely needed.

 

 

Re: happy birthday shadow

ROTFLMAO! This is GREAT! That's one very talented and clever man you have there!

~Nessime

PS - When do these hit the store shelves?

 

 

Re: happy birthday shadow

Sweeeeeet! Punny--very, very punny! Hey, Tay! I left a little something for you in the Terza Rima thread in Verse and Adversity. Catch me up later!

Lasbelindi

 

 

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