Discussing: Ch. 17 - Encroachment
Ch. 17 - Encroachment
Anglachel
Message: 35479
13 Dec 04 1:47 PM
Original Post
General Audience
Read-Only
Message: 35479
13 Dec 04 1:47 PM
Original Post
General Audience
Read-Only
Re: Ch. 17 - Encroachment
But, if you had a mind toward revising, that could be something to smooth over, as it just didn't strike me as up to par with many of the other excellent single-POV emotional scenes that make this fic the gem it is.
Well. Not that it's not obvious how Finduilas is feeling over Denethor (to everyone but herself, and of course him)....
I can't wait for his POV after this. Has he noticed how befuddled she has become? That should be juicy.
I like Halmir's confusion too. But I wasn't sure-- his first line to her, he just noticed she was a woman, yes, so he was simply asking why she was here, right? So, the second line, when he responds with such alarm-- does he think then that she is Arwen, or does he simply recognize her (wrongly) as being an Elf? I couldn't quite parse his response to her. Then again, I really don't understand his response to Thorongil either-- I don't know why the Lost should be so sour toward him, so obviously I'm missing something.
I like her visions of Denethor as a king. I like how much he 'feels' like Book-Faramir in so many places, with the stern (and badassed) but dreamy-visionary aware-of-one's-history-and-roots qualities.... But I digress.
I have done only a little work on Rohan of this era, of late, but I did want to say that your Morwen is eerily similar to the one I had been envisioning-- which is nothing if not handy, I must confess.
I like Luinil as well. I find myself almost wishing for her POV.
She probably understands more of what's going on than anyone else in the story.
-- B.
Re: Ch. 17 - Encroachment