On the outside, Sam seemed strong, tough, and reliable, a real man. Inside, though, he was sobbing silent tears, watching the dirt trail swiftly behind him as he moved forward at very manly pace.
‘How could I have left Bill there?” He thought sadly, thinking of the brownish, chestnut-like, yet exotic color of his best—and only—friend. ‘Bill was the only one who truly knew me,’ the Hobbit thought sadly to himself as he watched the wind—which he really could not see—blow around him, while he thought of the whole, wapping, few months that he had known Bill. It had been a lifetime to him.
“Wherever you are, Bill, I’ll miss you” Sam said out loud, ignoring the scholarly scowls that those around him gave him as he walked steadily along, watching the lack of trees around him. “I know you miss me, too.” Then, he broke down, and was left behind by his companions, who never wanted to bring him anyway, because he kept Legolas’ girl friend, Diarrhea Toiletia, from coming along.
Meanwhile, in a beautiful, oasis-like oasis swimming pool in southern California, Bill the Pony was enjoying himself, and decided to go see a movie with Legolas’ beautiful girl friend, and was glad that Sam was not with him anymore, and looked at the beautiful air around him, even though he couldn’t see it.
Note: The Mary-Sue’s name came from a story that my grandma told me. Apparently, a friend of hers knew someone who had named their child Diarrhea.
This is a work of fan fiction, written because the author has an abiding love for the works of J R R Tolkien. The characters, settings, places, and languages used in this work are the property of the Tolkien Estate, Tolkien Enterprises, and possibly New Line Cinema, except for certain original characters who belong to the author of the said work. The author will not receive any money or other remuneration for presenting the work on this archive site. The work is the intellectual property of the author, is available solely for the enjoyment of Henneth Annûn Story Archive readers, and may not be copied or redistributed by any means without the explicit written consent of the author.